This article originally appeared in “Better After 50” and is reproduced with permission from the author Pamela Madsen.
There is a lot of attention on older women seeking younger men. I’m not one of them. I think that men get better after 50. And I am writing this because it’s time to throw some love, affirmation, and attention on our “After 50” guys.
Like “After 50” women, you may be experiencing some changes in your body. Men: It’s possible that you might feel your strength ebb, and have moments where your body just doesn’t do what you would like it do in every moment. But, as a woman, that’s not what I care about. Let me tell you all about why many women (not just me) think that men who are more mature are hot.
- Older men are way more interested in giving women attention than they are in their own penis. Younger men are often way more interested in their own genitalia. Just go to any dating site and some young dude will send you a picture of his cock. Really? It’s like they have this brand new toy and they want everyone to see it. What are we suppose to say to “Penis Shots”? “Gee Honey, Nice Cock?” What is the right response? A more seasoned gentlemen would never do that. Instead, he will invite you in for a drink, murmur something about your beauty, ask you about yourself and offer to share some of his gifts. Older men have the patience and maturity to offer women what they want the most and that’s feeling special. There are few things sexier than having a man’s full and undivided presence. Men after 50 have figured out that it’s not the cock that is really sexy – it’s attention.
- Older men are less interested in getting to “end game”. The growth of the brain and heart has reached a stage where it has outsized the male ego. There is an embodied, relaxed, innate knowledge that you are who you are. You no longer have to prove anything to anyone. And how you love a woman is just like that too. It’s okay, we don’t need you to leap tall buildings in a single bound or stop a train or leap over a cliff. But damn we do like your slow hand. Your experience in not rushing us. Your deep appreciation for our bodies just the way it is. Older men love all kinds of woman’s bodies in a way that is simply different than a young buck who want us to look the way they think we are suppose to look. And that image comes from a magazine – not real women. Men after 50 have been around. They have learned that women come in many different packages, and they love all of the varied tastes and have the staying power to simply trace the curves and enjoy the journey.
- Older men are not necessarily a physical Adonis. Which can allow me to breath into my changing body too! I like that their body sometimes aches at night from a life time of living, because mine does too. They let their flaws show and that allows me to have orgasms without having to worry too much about my softer belly from having a baby or that stretch mark. It’s hard to have ecstatic sex while striking a pose to show you my body at it’s best angle. Really can I stop holding my breath? I love it that we can let go of our self consciousness about being perfect and have some really hot sex together! When I’m more relaxed, I feel sexier.
- Personally I think that power is sexy. A powerful man can be physically strong, have money, social standing, knowledge, a sense of self and discipline. Wisdom is powerful. They have a sense of accountability rather than point fingers in your face. They say that they want to hold your emotions and then they can actually do that! A powerful man owns himself. It’s true that young men can have some of this too, but I have found that older men seem to gather this stuff up along with their laugh lines. I love powerful men. I rarely see this in men under the age of 40.
- Older men know how to do things! They have this delicious tool box that is filled with all kinds of knowledge! I don’t care if it is how to figure out my computer or how to tie me up in knots! They have some knowledge under their belt. It’s not their first time at the rodeo for most things. My pussy is not the first pussy that they have done cunnilingus on! They have relationship skills, and can actually offer me insights to a better friend and lover. They have lived a great big life before they got to me, and they are often able to help me figure out whatever mess I have gotten myself into. This is way more important to me than a six pack ab.
And to all of you women who are looking for young men to play with- I support you! Because you are helping build a better man with a larger tool box for those of us who will be waiting for the older model. And of course young men are beautiful and smart and are on their life’s journey as we all have been.
But today, I wanted to celebrate where they will end up. As a hot silver fox who is ready, willing and able to hold a woman in full. Know that there are many of us out there who wouldn’t trade you for two 25 year old bench pressed surfer boys.