What do you wear to a kink party?

So you’re planning to step outside your comfort zone and check out a kink party! Fantastic! We know you’ll have an awesome time. But the big question, especially for females, is what do you wear to a kink party? 

Party Organisers will usually mention the dress code and if it’s a theme night that makes it much easier to plan. But “no street clothes” or "strict fetish" leaves us clueless while “We like formal, fancy dress, leather, latex, PVC, cross-dressing, burlesque, punk, uniforms, goth, industrial, cyber and crazy home-made creations” puts our stress levels into over-drive.

So here’s our checklist of what do you wear to a kink party.

Basic Black

You can’t go wrong with basic black. I wore a slinky black evening dress to very first BDSM party I went to and I didn’t feel out of place. A little black dress in latex or PVC is the ultimate fetish wardrobe essential which you can accessorise to create different looks.


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While leather itself is a sub-culture of the BDSM community you don’t have to spend a fortune to incorporate it into your outfit. Grab a leather jacket to wear over a corset or bondage bodysuit for an instant wow! Or team a faux leather skirt or pants with a mesh top, corset or bondage bra. 


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Fetishists love this slippery, shiny fabric and while black is the first colour that springs to mind latex comes in a whole rainbow of incredible colours. There are even metallicized and very sexy transparent options. 


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We've written a whole blog article dedicated to corsets. To me they are the next essential after a basic black dress. Make sure you get properly fitted for your first corset and shown how to lace it correctly. Different corsets achieve different looks, eg. over bust, under bust, flexible boning so do your research and invest in one which you can wear to create different looks. 


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Body Stocking

Perhaps for the braver amongst us bodystockings are undeniably sexy and can be worn under corsets, over lingerie, the possibilities are endless.

Wear your own Ink

Got ink? Make it the hero of your outfit by sticking to block colours with very little detail. 


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Wearable Bondage Lingerie

Lingerie designers realised a number of years ago that the fetish scene was a lucrative market so bondage style bras and bodysuits are readily available. You can also wear them over fishnet or latex for a more covered look.


What’s not to love about a sexy stockinged leg. You will have fetishists literally falling at your feet to worship you. 


A post shared by Roberta (@stockingselegance)

Wear your Underwear as Outerwear

So many lingerie companies have capitalized on the outerwear craze that you’re bound to find something on Instagram to suit any kink event.


From stockings, bodysuits, dresses and gloves, fishnet can be added as an accessory or can be your actual outfit. Mesh size can also vary ensuring you can be as daring as you wish. For a very polished leg wear a shiny dancers tight under your fishnet stockings.


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Fetish-goth, Fetish-punk, Fetish-cyber

The key here is alternative dress code, just think black and accessorise. Steampunk and renaissance are also popular options with the younger kink crowd. 


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Add Accessories

Think collars or cuffs, wigs, masks or leather caps, chains or spikes - creating an outfit is often just about the small details. And don’t forget a kick arse pair of stilettos, boots or platforms.


A post shared by rubberbemine (@rubberbemine)

Go with the Theme

Regular parties often have a theme and it’s no different from any other costume party, well other than the X frames and occasional nudity lol. So uniform, naughty schoolgirl, sexy secretary, nurse outfits will often be seen at fetish or kink events. 


A post shared by Libidex (@libidex)

If you’re still looking for inspiration then we suggest you head down to Fetish Expo in Melbourne on 14 October. As well as 60+ stalls of BDSM gear they have a Fetish Fashion Show featuring some of Australia’s most innovative designers. Follow them on Insta 


We also want to give a shout out to one of our fave latex designers right here in Sydney, the amazing Matt Bylett Designs. Check out his Insta and his incredible creations. 


Have your say! Login to comment.
  • Bluey1968


    More than a month ago

    Great article but, I just don't have the figure for any of those outfits..... what should I wear ?

  • xtasea4u


    More than a month ago

    What do guys wear besides a smile

  • Photos in private gallery


    More than a month ago

    Well for your first party less is more until you get a feel for what you like and what the people at the parties you go to are like. Just one big piece of advice for ladies who are wearing a corset for the first time, never ask a sadistic gentleman to help lace you up even if he is a friend as he's never tried to breathe in a corset that's too tight let alone eat or drink anything.

  • badthoughts63


    More than a month ago

    I usually wear goth stuff, pvc, silk, see through material, fishnet tshirt, etc. occasionally I like wearing a mini skirt. I miss the old hellfire club. Maybe I should start my own club.

    • KinkyGirl101


      More than a month ago

      We all miss Sydney Hellfire Club

    • badthoughts63


      More than a month ago

      Yes. Met some lovely people there

    • Itstimeforme470


      More than a month ago

      My girlfriend and at the time had our first partner swap experience at the old icebox club in the cross there on hellfire night oh the memories haha

    • shevek69


      More than a month ago

      Unforgettable times at the Hellfire Club!

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