In a BDSM context, chastity is a complex, layered, and a very personal choice. This article seeks to shed light on some of the ways individuals can empower themselves with this fascinating practice.

Just to be clear, for this article we are discussing (consensually) enforced chastity. We’re not talking about abstinence or celibacy – although both can be a side-effect of chastity. We’re delving into the concept that another person has control over your sexual organs and their use. 

Historically, both Eastern and Western religious traditions consider chastity a virtue, and it's from these ideologies that devices were developed to prevent sexual activity: the first chastity belts. Originally designed during the latter part of the Middle Ages to protect women from sexual predators, the belts were made from a metal waist band, with a metal plate that went over the crotch, and attached to the back of the belt. But it wasn’t until the sexually repressive Victorian Era that chastity belts really made their way into the mainstream as anti-masturbation devices. 

These days, chastity devices are mostly used in the realm of BDSM with a refreshed focus on controlling the sexual activity of men. 

For many kinksters, chastity is the ultimate in power exchange – it features mental and physical masochism and control, with huge opportunities for mind-fuckery. It symbolises total control and devotion, and whether you’re the one with the lock or the key, there is a lot of joy in knowing someone is always thinking about you!

Chastity can be broken down into three main styles:

1. circumstantial chastity in the context of a scene (eg. forced feminisation, ruined orgasms) 
2. short-term chastity to frustrate, deny, punish, or as practice for longer-term
3. long-term chastity in an ownership dynamic.

And the chastity journey can be broken down into four phases that are both physical and psychological:

1. the fight: physical and mental resistance to the reality of the fantasy evidenced through discomfort, nervousness, or the wish to ‘escape’
2. the adjustment: the time spent getting the mind and body acquainted with its predicament and bringing the person in chastity settled enough to incorporate other play (physical, eg impact or psychological, eg. humiliation)
3. the acceptance: understanding and engaging with the Dominant’s hold and control of sexual activity, and being physically able to manage the device and the consequences of wearing it
4. the rejection: either the submissive gets over it and needs a break, or the Dominant decides the submissive has had enough.

Each chastity style will have its own journey, and this journey will be paced in the context of the style and the agreed upon time span. For circumstantial chastity, the journey might take place over an hour or two, and the steps will be accelerated. For long-term chastity the ‘fight’ stage could take months and be a mental back and forth on deciding whether long-term chastity is something truly desired or just a fantastical phase. 

Regardless of the style of the play, and the journey undertaken there are several considerations to keep in mind. The first big one is choosing a device.

Whether you choose a light weight, but less robust, plastic device or an indestructible, but heavier, stainless steel one, the most important thing to consider is the fit, particularly if considering wearing a device for more than a couple of hours. 

The most common style of device for the penis is the Ball Trap Cage; the testes and penis are both pulled through a ring, and the penis is then inserted into the cage. The cages themselves come in a variety of lengths, styles, locks, and designs so selection comes down to how much you wish to suppress the dick, the level of control the wearer needs to have, and what sort of look you are wanting to create. There is an array of online sources to guide you on getting your measurements right for sizing, so be sure to be diligent in this step as ill-fitting cages can become quite problematic.

For those with vulvas the most common device is the Y-Style Chastity Belt; just imagine a g-string with a hard plastic, silicone, or stainless crotch. Although the basics are similar, there are an array of add-ons or customisations to choose from. Some belts have a grate to release urine; some come equipped with plugs for the vagina and/or anus; some even come with thigh garters that can be chained together to keep the legs closed. Where once chastity belts for women were an obstacle for horny virgins, now the biggest problem is choosing the one you want. 

As with any kink activity, you need to have your head around the risks and how you can manage your own safety. Chastity is no different. Be sure to start with short amounts of time in various situations to see how your body reacts and how the device fits – never go straight to longer term. Many kinksters will tolerate a lot of pain, and getting hard while being squashed into a cage can definitely cause discomfort; as can sitting in a Y-Style Belt. If you have ongoing pain, you should check it out. Suffering any loss of circulation, numbness, tingling, or discoloration should result in the immediate removal of the device – it is likely to be a bad fit that is doing you damage.

If wearing a device for any length of time (days, weeks, months!) you will need to consider hygiene. One of the reason stainless steel devices are generally chosen for longer term use is their ability to be cleaned with more ease than the silicone or plastic varieties. Cleaning will vary depending on the device being worn and the journey the individual has undertaken. It can be embraced as a devotional activity to the KeyHolder/Dominant, or feel like a frustrating addition to the day’s chores. Either way, the chaste wearer will be contemplating their role and that’s part of the process. Most people choose to clean their device and genitals with basic soap and water, but it’s the drying that is vital. Moisture is not your friend – dampness can lead to bacterial growth and any chafed or broken skin could become infected. 

Finally (and vitally!) make sure there is more than one key. The last thing we want is anyone rocking up to the ER to have their device sawn from their crotch. Although the Owner/Dominant will more than likely be the KeyHolder, they also need to ensure their chaste property can access a key in case of emergency.

Chastity has evolved over the last few hundred years from something forced upon women to keep them ‘safe’, to a way to ward off the ‘dangers’ of masturbation, and has grown to become another way to explore intimacy and sexuality. So whether it’s for a fun fantasy or a longer-term commitment, do your due diligence and study up on the device that would work best for both your BDSM play and your lifestyle. But most importantly, be sure to take things slow and build – there’s no need rush this experience. It’s time for literal ‘no fucks given’ and you get to own it! Enjoy!

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  Zamboon

  66M Bridgeman Downs, QLD,

   AU

  There was a husband of a popular lady on here some years ago, he had a huge cock, and while she was the player she was very jealous of him - he agreed to wear a cock cage - he had to work away for a while and he regularly was inspected by airport security when he set off alarms walking through - was quite happy to tell them and anyone else who was listening that he had a cock cage and was "wanded" and taken to a private room where he quite happily undressed for inspection ..

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