Some handy hints and tips on how you can continue your swinging adventure while keeping the kids in the dark and out of your play space.
There is nothing in the rule book that says once you are a parent that all the fun times are over. In fact, most couples I know didn’t start the really fun stuff until after they had kids! You just have to know what options are available in order to squeeze in some playtime of your own.
While there are a growing number of parents swinging, there are some couples who are putting off the breeding part until they’ve had enough fun… Well let me share something with you, while you may eventually get to a point where you feel you have had enough and could stop playing to have kids, at some point you are more than likely going to want to come back to the playground for more. The beauty of it is, you can!
So here are some tips and hints to swinging when you’ve got kids. Please keep in mind that not everyone will be comfortable with some of the suggestions, I suggest you just choose what will work best for you.
If they are old enough for sleep overs at friends houses, perfect. Kids generally like to stay with their friends as long as possible so if you have the 2 (or more) of them one night, negotiate that they all go to the other kids place the next night or vice versa.
Baby sitters are great, and if they can have them overnight it’s even better! Where possible this is one of the best options. The only issue is that it sometimes requires some advanced planning and things don’t always work to plan on the night. We’ve managed to get a night off only to have our playmates cancel for unexpected reasons, leaving us with a night without kids and no extra fun. In times like that, some back up single guys are good and often available (not to be confused with easy, although some are), or else just enjoy some quality time together and do something different.
Family members are good babysitters too, although they may ask questions if you are using their services on a very regular basis. They’ll only accept “it’s a dinner party thing and no one is bringing their kids” so many times. So share the babysitting around and occasionally entertain at home so you can keep up the fun times without arousing suspicion.
When the kids are younger, such as less than 2, chances are that once they are in bed that you’ll get a good 6 – 12 hours of adult only time so it doesn’t matter if they are in the house or not. You just have to be prepared that if they do wake up crying, that it may interrupt play. You know what your child’s sleep patterns are so you’ll know if this can work for you.
For older kids it can be a little trickier if you’re entertaining at home. Generally they don’t get up, but they could. Some kids knock, some don’t and some master bedrooms share walls with kids and there’s nothing worse than trying to have a screaming orgasm quietly. The key is keeping them in their rooms and having enough warning to untangle yourself from whoever and tend to them.
So here are my top tips for managing the older kids while you entertain at home:
- Wear them out during the day!
- Take them to a park or have friends over so they are pretty much running around and expending energy but here is the thing, do as little as possible to expend your energy too!
- A healthy level of exercise is energizing but too much and you’ll lose some for your evening workout!
- A warm bath or shower, add some lavender essential oils – make them sleepy! If they like hot milk or a before bed treat (that won’t keep them up), give them that too.
- Bribery! What can I say, it works. If they are sometimes tough to get to stay in their rooms early on in the evening, and your guests are coming over, bribe them with something they love in order to have them stay in their room ALL night. If there is another room in the house that has a TV and DVD – let them fall asleep watching a movie, as long as you can keep them at one end of the house and you at another. Oh and just make sure that you don’t bribe them with something that will take a lot of effort first thing in the morning when all you want to do is sleep, like cooking pancakes.
- If you bedroom is sharing a wall with at least one child, take your play to the other end of the house. What you need then is a way of creating an alarm system if they happen to get up. We found that the toddler door safety gadgets worked well, as it stopped them from opening the door completely and they would yell at that point. That gave us enough time to throw a dressing gown on (make sure you have one in the play area) and meet them at the hall door. Or else the old baby monitors, stick the microphone in the hallway and take the receiver into your play room. Oh and don’t forget to clean up the play room, you don’t want to have to explain why there is a condom, massage oil, candles, G-string or a towel in there…
Worst case scenario and you get busted, be prepared to spill the beans or come up with a highly creative story of why you’re both naked with a few other people and Mummy wasn’t kissing Daddy.
Now go forth and have some fun, it’s what life is all about!
PS: You might also want to tell your playmates there are kids in the house so they don’t go wandering off naked and scare the little ones!