Astrological Tournament: Which Astrological Sign is the Best in Bed?

Manipulated image to convey the 12 astrological signs

Every member of the zodiac brings something indispensable to the table (or bedroom, as it were), but pitting you against each other makes for a fun thought experiment. Here’s how various signs match up in the sack:
 

Round One: Dirty Dozen

Stamina

1. Sagittarius v. Aries: These are two of the most athletic types of folks around. But although these fire signs burn intensely, Aries is keener on burning in short, spontaneous bursts. Sagittarius is the one you'll be panting to keep up with.

Winner: Sagittarius

2. Capricorn v. Libra: Stern, serious Capricorn is quite the randy goat when you get him in the right mood, but, balance and fairness being key, Libra will always hold out until everyone gets served.

Winner: Libra
 

Creativity

1. Leo v. Aquarius: When it comes to the sheer force of creative expression, there's no one like Leo to colour your world. However, their bedside manner may involve a heavy dose of self-worship, and Aquarius takes pleasure in simply being weird. Chalk one up to Aquarius.

Winner: Aquarius
 

2. Gemini v. Scorpio: Endlessly curious, the Gemini lover can be relied on to change things up and dole out some rather imaginative dirty talk. But with "Scorpio" practically synonymous with "sex," these brooding dynamos doth runneth over with intense (and sometimes twisted) sexual fantasies.

Winner: Scorpio
 

Generosity

1. Taurus v. Pisces: Taurus is as solid and patient as they come, but for Pisces, the act of giving reaches ego-dissolving proportions.

Winner: Pisces

2. Cancer v. Virgo: Once you provide a safe and secure space for your crab to sex you up, they'll get to work on that "nurturing" thing they're so famous for. Virgo's pretty keen on getting things just right, but sometimes even a minor fly in the ointment is enough to derail their sexual appetite. At the very least, Cancer doesn't confuse perfectionism with a willingness to give.

Winner: Cancer

 

Round Two: Sexy Six

Some Like It Hot

Sagittarius v. Scorpio: Does "S" stand for "Sagittarius," "Scorpio," or "smolder?" You can expect an intense night with either of these two, but unlike Sagittarius, Scorpio doesn't get bored that easily – with this sign, the well runs deep.

Winner: Scorpio
 

Peak Stimulation

Libra v. Aquarius: For these air signs, the mind is its own erogenous zone. Aquarius is likely to expand your horizons with their experimental, avant-garde approach to everything, but Libras can get out of their heads just enough to bring some romance into the mix.

Winner: Libra
 

Smooth Operators

Pisces v. Cancer: Sensual and seductive wins the race for these watery creatures, but on some level, Cancer is giving you the night of your life on his or her terms. Sensitivity is no foreign concept to either, but Pisces tunes in and drops out.

Winner: Pisces

 

Round Three: Thrilling Threesome

Scorpio v. Libra v. Pisces: We wouldn't mind getting in the middle of these three, but there's only one first-place trophy to give out, so here goes nothing. While sex with Libra can be downright cinematic, their often spellbinding charm might cause you to overlook minor flaws in their performance. And while Pisces aim to please, selflessness doesn't always make for an ideal mate. You want your sexy friend to hold their own! It's true that Scorpio might be too much for some to handle, but that's because this sign is typically bringing body, soul, and all corners of their psyche to the table.

Winner: Scorpio

6 comments

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  • 1DoorMan

    1DoorMan

    More than a month ago

    I am an Aquarius an I love other Aquarius women can be a gentle trickle and turn into a storm .But I do luv you all.

    Reply
  • Photos in private gallery

    pharkin

    More than a month ago

    For the experiences I've had, definitely the Scorp will fuck you senseless for a long time, the Aquarian will always entertain and add something new every time you revisit, the Cancerian will fuck you and you will fall in love with her/him.

    Reply
  • Michael8619

    Michael8619

    More than a month ago

    absolute bollocks!

    Reply
  • THORGODOFTHUNDE

    THORGODOFTHUNDE

    More than a month ago

    I call " BULLSHIT " !
    Everyone knows G E M I N I ' S rule

    • sensualover122

      Account Closed

      More than a month ago

      I Hear you man, 'cause I'm a Gemini too, but Scorpio WOMEN....dey are da BOMB!

    Reply
  • sensualover122

    sensualover122

    More than a month ago

    I have to agree with your findings!
    This is only one man's findings, but the sample group is large enough to be valid.
    Thirty six years of sex with countless (approx 500) women from all over the Zodiac has proved to me without a doubt that Scorpio women will (& I'm gonna say this as nicely & succinctly as I can) fuck you all night/day long...until you are a dehydrated 'husk' (shell) at the edge of the bed pleading for mercy!
    That's not to say that women from other star signs, specifically Aquarians & Taureans & the odd Cancerian, don't put a lot of passion & energy into long, strong sessions; BUT Scorpio gals are consistently at the top of the fuck chain.
    Hallelujah!

    Reply
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