The sex shop

When I was in the sex shop in Byron Bay
just the other day,
I was feeling rather shy and coy
so I said to the young sales boy.
‘Would you mind helping me choose a sex toy?’
‘Certainly’, he replied ‘That’s no bother.
May I suggest for an elderly lover
a porn video of sexy young girls is a must
because no doubt it will ignite his lust,
and the bawdy sex scene
will hopefully make him horny and keen.’
‘Excuse me Sir!’ Against your remark I must take a stance.
Your comments just demonstrate your ignorance.
As a matter of fact, as I grow older,
I grow sensually bolder
for I am ‘Tess the 'Timeless Sensual Goddess.’
So, tell me; why with youth do you obsess?’
‘Well’, he retorted ‘Here’s the real deal.
By your age women have lost their sex appeal.
Let’s face it! Calling a spade a spade.
When a woman's hair turns grey her looks too will fade.
The sad truth is you old Sheila’s are past your use by date to stir a man’s lust.’
And I am betting most likely you have started to rust.’
So, I gave the arrogant clown
a piece of my mind and a dressing down.
‘With all due respect young lad, you need to understand
that women of any age can sexually arouse a man.
We don’t suddenly turn bat shit boring beige,
and our lustful sensuality
does not decline with age.
This fact you can trust.
Because the truth is that lust
is the juice that feeds the soul,
and makes us feel whole.
And for the record your ageist, sexist attitude I truly despise.’
Then right before his astonished eyes
I mischievously danced with my pretty pink hat.
And can you believe he called me ‘A crazy old bat!’
“Remember” I chided “I am the ‘Tess
The Timeless Sensual Goddess’
full of lust and oozing sensuality’
Then toying with my scarf ever so seductively
I mustered all my alluring Goddess charm,
and teasingly trailed my fingers up and down his arm.
Next, I provocatively stroked his gorgeous thigh,
and as he heaved a heavenly sigh
I heard him groan and gasp with ecstatic delight.
So, I whispered, “Tell me big man are your jeans too tight?”
By now I was feeling sassy and bold,
and my lust suddenly increased 3-fold
so, with gay abandonment I let my inner Goddess dance.
Quite obviously common sense didn’t stand a chance.
Then ignoring the fact, I was the proverbial ‘old girl’
I smiled coquettishly and seductively gyrated my hips in a come-hither twirl.
By now I was in my stride
So, brazenly I flashed my derrière with aplomb and pride.
Then his eyes boggled.
His knees wobbled,
and finally, when my dress came tumbling down
he collapsed to the floor like a circus clown.
‘Perhaps’, I remonstrated ‘Because of your feeble mind you temporarily forgot
That women of all ages are sexy and hot to trot
“You are incorrigible!”
he bemoaned “Can’t you just be sensible?”
But obviously that was impossible
for I was completely unstoppable.
Besides stripping just made me boulder and boulder.
So impudently I rolled my naked shoulder
“It’s just not fair!”
I pouted kicking my leg in the air,
and provocatively straddling the wooden chair.
Lascivious lust is So! SO! wasted on the young,
but now it is my turn to have some bawdy fun.
When I feel my thigh,
it makes me high.
With a, Olalla and a heavenly sigh.
As my fingers caress
from my thighs to my breasts.
It’s simply the orgasmic best.”
Then I gave my hair a triumphant toss saying with finesse.
“Remember every woman is a ‘Timeless Sensual Goddess’
With that I sashayed across the floor
Pausing at the shop door.
‘And, by the way
I forgot to say.
I wanted the sex toy
for my gorgeous horny toy boy.