The Fine Art of Fisting

by Eva Sless - 21 May 2016 - 42 Member Comments
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Fisting. If you don't know much about it, or have only really ever seen it in porn, I can understand that half of you reading this probably just squeezed your legs together a little tighter and thought “nuh-uh. Not inside me!” And I totally get it.

How does the porn industry portray fisting?

If you look at fisting porn, you'll most often see a rather violent-looking punching of someone's vagina or anus and then some pretty full on gaping and stretching.

It can look very confronting and, as with a lot of porn, if that's all you see and all you have to go on for your education, then yeah, I can totally see why you're not all that keen to try.

I have to say, though, I think the worst thing about fisting is the name. It sounds violent. It sounds crass. It sounds painful.

The Key to Pleasurable Fisting

But, here's the thing, fisting, although definitely something to ease into, is not just a mindless fucking of holes with no regard for the person who owns the hole. It can be an intense and extremely pleasurable connection to a sexual partner. It can illicit feelings and sensations like no other and can leave you feeling wholly satisfied and rather euphoric. 

The key to pleasurable fisting is arousal. Lots of arousal. As I have mentioned before, the vagina is an extremely elastic body part. It can stretch over 200% of its original size (and can go back to being exactly the same tightness afterwards), and the more aroused she is, the more easily able to be stretched it is. In fact, during arousal the vagina will automatically increase in size, and is far more willing to be pushed to allow more.

Firstly, though, let's wipe from your mind the image many people come up with when thinking about fisting... The fist. 

Although, yes, in some hardcore pornos and situations fisting involves an actual tight fist, the reality is a lot different. It's more like the shape you make your hand when pretending to be a duck: Four fingers on top, and the thumb tucked under. Play around with the position of your fingers, you can rest one or two on top or underneath others to create a more compact shape.

The other thing to remember is to take your time and take it slowly. Don't just go barging in with five fingers and expect her to thank you. Use lots of lube and also warm her up with some oral sex or something you know gets her motor running. Start slowly using fingers, just one, then two, slowly and gently, and let her vagina open up to you. You will feel it. The slower you go, the more her body will relax and ease into it, and you will actually feel your fingers and hand being accepted.

The hardest part of the entering is probably when you get to the knuckles. It can be a bit of a push to get them through but, again, slow is the key. Slow but firm. Listen to her sounds and feel the way her body moves. She will most likely help you by pushing down on your hand, but don't get too excited and start shoving. Let her dictate the speed and the pressure. You may find you need to twist or wiggle your hand to get further in, and that's fine too, as long as you remember to focus on her and how she's feeling.

Clitoral stimulation can really help too. She may want to take over that side of it, and that's great because it will allow you to focus solely on the task at hand (pun slightly intended).

Is Fisting Painful?

When it comes to the idea of pain, which is what turns a lot of people off the idea, the thing to remember is that pain is not only subjective, it is also not necessarily the direct fault of the action. What I mean is even the most ordinary and simple sex acts can be painful or uncomfortable if done wrong or done when the other person is not fully aroused or into it.

When I talk about pain being subjective I mean it in a couple of ways. One, every person has a different threshold and two, what is associated with the pain also has a direct impact on how you feel about it.

For example, I have a lot of tattoos. I love them. Do they hurt? Yes. But the pain is attached to something positive. To new ink! It's exciting and fun and, the more tattoos I get, the more I look forward to that hot needley pain. I almost crave it. The same goes for sex that has an element of pain to it. Spanking, scratching, biting. All that good stuff. It becomes associated with pleasure. Not just simple pleasure either, but intense pleasure and connection. It's amazing.

It also doesn't have to hurt at all! Like I mentioned above, the more aroused she is, the more slowly you take it, the more likely she is to open up and allow that fullness to encompass her. It's all about listening, feeling and watching her reactions and moving in time and conjunction with her.

And, one of the best things? Fisting is a little like a good spanking, for the next little while afterwards, every time you sit down you get a rush of amazing flashback memory that can often leave you a little breathless and horny and excited for the next time you play!

42 Member Comments

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  1. justforfun558

    More than a month ago
    I have been fisted several times and don't enjoy it at all. It does nothing for me sexually. Secondly, it hurt like crazy. I only let 2 men who did it the right way where it didn't hurt, but even then, it did nothing for me. One man was so rough and painful, he tore me and I was bleeding very badly. I am not at all interested to do it again.

    Genough

    More than a month ago
    Sorry to here of your bad experiences justforfun558, with a couple of your experiences being ok but did nothing for you. See it's the way fisting is articulated, i agree with Eva Sless, if fisting is done in the right way it can be very pleasurable. Most guys don't know how to do it right due to having a penis & not the mind of a Woman with not knowing how the female body & parts senses are really arousely triggered. Why do you think there are alot of Lesbian playing these days, because Women know how to give full pleasure to another Woman & have the understanding of another Woman, most guys have the thinking of sex & nothing more with them getting off on the sex & not the female, for instance the saying "wham bam, thank you mam" which is ignorant to the female. So what i am trying to say is maybe not quitting & finding that right guy that can do it right for you with you feeling the pleasure of all sex acts such as fisting. :)
  2. ArfieIzaBugga

    More than a month ago
    I was immersed in Reading all the Comments about Fisting from all of my Fellow Members of AMM and the Mental Picture of Mowerman50 getting Booted from his Local Fruit Shop for being a wee bit over the Top in Testing the Ripeness of the Melon he was Road Testing .. Cracked me Up!!! :=]
    :
    To AllinmyMind, I will go thirds in your Fruit Shop with PandHforFun and yourself. lol
    :
    Lastly to Wewant toShare, Your Profile has always intrigued me :=] Now I know why? Such a shame we live so far apart ;-} lol
    :
    I have always had this Fantasy about Fisting but never "Knew why? ... Most probably will never find out but the Fantasy is nice and we all are allowed to Fantasise huh?
    :
    Thanks AMM for putting up some wonderful Blogs, I do enjoy reading about the other Peoples Likes and Dislikes as well as gaining an Insight into how the other Half get the Mostest Out of Life!!! .. Cheers, Arfie :=]
  3. Peachee26

    More than a month ago
    Irresponsible and too rough fisting with a punching motion can cause death through excessive bleeding in some unfortunate cases.
  4. Lap.rides

    More than a month ago
    First bit of advice I was ever given about adult internet dating;

    Never brag about your cock size to a woman who lists fisting in her interests, haha.

    Melody2973

    More than a month ago
    Funny :)),

    Lap.rides

    More than a month ago
    You are a flirt....

    Melody2973

    More than a month ago
    Am I just ???, you know what they say about presumptions :(
  5. hotsauce60

    More than a month ago
    When I was younger I was constantly avoding my ass being touched, now im greedy and fill awkward asking to have all 5 pushed up there, lol
  6. SecretService16

    More than a month ago
    Awesome article, I personally love it....I like to help the guy sometimes by holding his wrist and helping him slowly guide it in, especially if he is new to it....but yes, slow and steady with lots of lube and I love to use a vibe egg on my clit while he is doing it....feels AMAZING!!!!!!!

    questionalways

    More than a month ago
    great insight
  7. Snowe7

    More than a month ago
    Don't watch "professional" fisting porn, watch amateur fisting porn. So much better.

    wewantoshare

    More than a month ago
    Where do you get your fisting porn from Snowe7?
  8. Mowerman50

    More than a month ago
    I just got thrown out of my local fruitshop for staring at the chick on the cash register and practicing on the half rockmelons :(

    AMM.Editor

    More than a month ago
    Outrageous! How's a guy supposed to know how to squeeze a melon if he can't practice.

    DeliciousEva

    More than a month ago
    It was the eye contact with the check out girl that was the problem.
    It's like eating a banana in public.
    Look down. Look down!!!

    allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    I think I'll have to buy a fruit shop lol
  9. ((Rummy))

    More than a month ago
    fisting if done right and in the right mood can be a mind blowing and erotic experience for both parties.... i have been on receiving and giving end as i have rather tiny hands, and omfg the experience can be amazing..... for me its the ultimate sensation and if not done too often can be quite sensual and fun...
  10. Coupleforkink

    More than a month ago
    For me its just about the ultimate pleasure imaginable. I'm very lucky my husband has relatively small hands and and when he hits the spot the orgasms are unbelievable. We would love to find another compatible couple were the wife has similar desires so we can enjoy together.

    way2direct

    More than a month ago
    Fisting - the sexiest play ever!
  11. allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    The picture is great, really evocative of fisting, it is drawing me in.

    AMM.Editor

    More than a month ago
    Thank you, Eva and I worked hard to find an image which evoked the sensuality. We're glad you like it.

    wewantoshare

    More than a month ago
    Here Here!!!

    DeliciousEva

    More than a month ago
    Its so good.
    I think it's sexier than an actual pic of the act.
    Just delicious.
  12. 1thatlikesthat

    More than a month ago
    So those are the pros you firgot to mention the cons. Like the icing on a cake it is only tasty till you eat the inside and it can be dry and 2 days old. Something that seems pleasurable doing it too often will give you medical issues as yes vagina it is elastic but it doesn't spring back every time and isn't meant to be treated like a flytrap.

    The cons are that like anything don't just do it to make the guy like you because you think you have to. You don't and guys never stay around if don't keep doing what they want to most are self absorbed in themselves and want to do something that is dangerous to a woman but doesn't harm themselves a bit like being run over by a bus 100 times let's see how well you spring back after the 1st 2nd 3rd or 100th time. You think a man would want some woman's hand up their anal canal it springs back.

    You can't turn a negative painful experience like a tattoo into something positive it doesn't work like that ie tattoos last forever and sure you may like it now and want more but they make it harder to get that great job with the more than minimum wage for example.

    Remember always if you want to fist like anything the risks outnumber the pleasure. Have fun??

    wewantoshare

    More than a month ago
    Perhaps a bad experience with the wrong man cannot be generalized? Only do it if it,s what you want, and make sure you fist with someone you can trust and who is doing it for mutual benefit!!

    allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    I will thanks.

    Icelady121

    More than a month ago
    You make some very valid points , I think these should have been included in the article , no mention of infections etc . Also great pointing out Don't do it just to be liked by the guy
  13. dav6191

    More than a month ago
    My wife and I have been practicing fisting for years and she is amazing at it, we slowly build up to it and when she is ready it is amazing sex that always results in squirting we love it.
  14. Melody2973

    More than a month ago
    Amazing :)))),

    Discreetguy63

    More than a month ago
    I agree Melody. I have done it once and she couldn't get enough.
  15. specialguy45

    More than a month ago
    Nothing better then easing into an erotic fisting. Had the pleasure of delivering some great sensual fistings in the past and looking forward to the next.
  16. xyz4000

    More than a month ago
    we love it, do it all the time, stretching & splitting her in two. once have all the wrist it then insert cock & fk ur fist while its inside her. She goes crazy. Enjoy.

    way2direct

    More than a month ago
    I love that and I also love stroking my cock in her butt, through her membrane for a very hot feeling!

    tomskippy

    More than a month ago
    Fuck she must have a big pussy to take a fist & a cock lol
  17. Discreetguy63

    More than a month ago
    I have had one fisting experience. The lady was so into it. She didn't need lube, just her juices and couldn't get enough. Slow at first then faster and faster with my whole hand. Went for more than an hour and she wanted more. My arms were too tired to lift. Way to go. Love to help a lady out in that way again.
  18. wewantoshare

    More than a month ago
    My first xperience with fisting was as a 17yo with an older lady. It's a beautiful way for a lady to climax again and again and if performed skillfully, is the most exillerating satisfying mindblowing sex a lady and a man can have in my opinion!
  19. Durango26

    More than a month ago
    I used to have a lover that would become so wet, that we never required for fisting. And the fisting almost always led to her squirting. Very erotic.
  20. bigdanny148

    More than a month ago
    never ever fisting was possible until I meet this woman on amm, no lube was necessary she told me to put my whole hand in her pussy.....omg it fit perfectly up to my wrist and I don't even have small hands!
  21. allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    Oh dear the stretching word, how I loathe it, and fisting is my favourite thing to do in bed. And no I don't feel pain, and I don't want to. The punching is only accepted sometimes, it is like stage two for me. Slowly is better. Scratching, biting and spanking has no relevance to the way I am fisted.

    You left out the best part the proud feeling of the sex afterwards as the fluids inside after fisting are different and very nice.

    Pandhforfun

    More than a month ago
    Hello darling, haha, why did I know you would be in the comments section, lol.

    allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    I hope that was just about fisting, not that I should shh up now lol.

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