7 Remarkable things about your Penis

by Adult Match Maker - 14 May 2016 - 18 Member Comments

Penises are pretty remarkable things. They are life givers, pleasure givers, turkey slap givers... They can be funny (helicopter anyone?) and they can give away your secret desires (is that a gun in your pocket?).

We here at Adult Match Maker love them. We love the nicknames you give them, the way they feel when we touch them, hey, we even like some of the dick pics we see on your profiles (just please don't PM them without a request, thanks), so we thought we'd come up with a little piece to show you just how amazing and funky they can be. We searched high and low to find some of the more interesting and perhaps left of centre facts we could find, to celebrate the wonder that is your little man between your legs.

No Bones About It

Even though we humans call an erect penis a boner, and even though a huge percentage of mammals on the planet have a little bone called a baculum which rests inside the abdomen until needed (for speed in getting an erection and then the maintaining of it), humans do not have them nor have we had them since before we became (pardon the science pun) Erectus. But apart from us and the spider monkey, every single other primate on the planet has one. 

Broken Bones

Okay, so you haven't got a bone in your penis, but that doesn't mean it can't break. Oh yes, painfully and unfortunately yes. A broken penis is called a penile fracture and it is caused by accidentally bending or twisting it in a fast jerking bend usually during hardcore sex or masturbation. Girl-On-Top has been the most common position this happens in, usually because the guy lets the girl take over the thrusting duties. Basically the penis slips out and is slammed back in but misses and bends. The stiff membrane tears and there's a very loud pop or crack. The resulting injury is not only horrifically painful, but looks it too. Don't panic too much, though, it's super rare. Only 1600 cases have ever been reported since it was first registered as happening in 1924.

Foreskin Healing

The human body is a remarkable machine and, mixed with scientists who are also pretty darn remarkable, is capable of doing some really amazing things. Although our body is able to heal itself pretty well, sometimes we need a bit of help, and by using the cells from circumcised baby foreskins, scientists have been able to grow brand new skin that is used in grafting burn victims. In fact one baby's foreskin can be used to grow around 4 acres of new skin! Regardless of your feelings on circumcision (we know it's a controversial topic) you've gotta admit that's a pretty awesome medical advancement.

Largest and Probably Not So

The largest penis in the world belongs to a Mexican guy named Roberto Esquivel Cabrera and it measures in at 18.9 inches (that's 48.2 centimetres, guys). That's seriously a whopper! He's an older guy in his 50s and has stated time and time again that it is far more of a curse than a blessing and it has basically ruined his life. No-one will have sex with him, he has never had a long term girlfriend or a wife because it frightens them, he can't work, he can't even walk comfortably sometimes. So maybe don't aspire to be that big, guys. Just love the one you have.

Speaking of world record penis sizes, if you ever get your hands on a copy of the North Korean Book of World Records apparently Kim Jong-il's penis was over three feet long... Hmmm... Considering he was only around 5 feet high himself... Something tells us this is probably not so true.

I was in the Pool !

Ah shrinkage. We all know it happens when the weather gets a bit cooler or you take a dip in cold water, but did you know there are a few more things that can make your penis shrink? Lack of use can cause it to shorten a bit, so lots of sex and masturbation is very healthy for a good sized cock! Excessive smoking and drinking is a very common cause of penile shrinking, as is putting on weight. It's not that it actually shrinks if you get fatter, but it becomes hidden in the excess weight. This condition is known as a buried penis. In fact an overweight man can gain around an inch for approximately every 15-20 kilos he loses... What a great excuse to get to the gym, huh, guys!

I'll Take the Large, Thanks

As well as coloured and ribbed and flavoured and lubricated, condoms come in a variety of sizes, but as much as you guys want to think you're Godzilla in the pants department it's actually really rare that you will need the largest size. In fact, only around 6% of men need to wear anything larger than a regular fit condom, and it's actually really dangerous to buy bigger condoms if you don't need them. Firstly there's the obvious problem of it falling off during intercourse which can lead to all sorts of complications like pregnancy and even death, but it also, from a female's perspective, looks funny. It actually makes your penis look smaller, floating around in a too-big condom. We don't really care about size anyway... We just want to know you can use it properly.

Record Breakers!

Okay, so we don't really trust the North Korean Record books, but there are a few penis records that are definitely true, and perhaps a little bit bizarre. Included in this awesome list are:

  • Porn Actor Azael broke a record with 11 ejaculations in a 24 period while screen testing for an upcoming film he was hoping to make.
  • Horst Schultz holds the record for the furthest spurt of semen, managing to get it to fly 5.7 meters!
  • In 1995 Mo Ka Wang (no pun, we promise) broke a record lifting 250 pounds (that's over 113 kilos!) from the ground with his penis.
  • Masanobu Sato is a young Japanese guy who masturbated straight for over nine hours, giving him the world masturbation championship prize!

So there you go, guys! Your penis is pretty cool! And so are other people's too! In fact, if you're looking after it, treating it well, buying it a nice meal once in a while, your penis will be a source of great times, great laughs and perhaps some great records too! Love your schlong, we certainly do!

18 Member Comments

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  1. shortncute

    More than a month ago
    since this is a blog about the Penis

    I cant understand why you guy's take photo off your Penis & only your penis and put it up as a profile shot............. Is that the only attractive feature you think you have & what your thought process when you do it, as i would much prefer a photo off your face or another body part, as when you have seen it time and time again you think REALLY!!!
    That's just my view on this topic as I have seen more attractive shot's than just your Penis
  2. enricom

    More than a month ago
    "Skin regeneration" is no excuse or reason to warrant the mutilation of a baby boy's penis. Stem cell (umbilical) and other means exist today, which are less invasive and more efficient.
  3. Gen.Guy

    More than a month ago
    I just want to know why anyone would want to lift 113 kg with his penis lol
  4. joe2442

    More than a month ago
    I notice far more guys+girls talk about penis size as a high sex-status than 10-15-20 years ago. Certainly in the 90's penis size wasn't discussed as much. But with the rise of social media last 10 years or so, penis size has become far more talked about and it's importance. Things like good looking face/body were seen as high status symbols for men, more than dick size, but dick size has become it seems increasingly important as a high status symbol for men, or at least far more talked about. And a lot of debate about, what option? Option 1-Big dick average looking guy Option-2 Good looking handsome face- Average size penis/small penis, and which option women would prefer etc
  5. pearlneckalace

    More than a month ago
    penis are useless has a head that cant think two balls that dont bounce everytime he has to do a little work he spews his guts up??


    More than a month ago
    Yeah, but ain't they fun to suk & lick & fondle & chew & slide on & impale yrself on & wriggle on & bang up against & squeeeeze with my muscles?
    Ohhh, those balls... ditto! More please, sir? I like my morning protein shaken, stirred and swallowed...
  6. Darkstud

    More than a month ago
    My concept is know know to use the penis well rather than worry about its size


    More than a month ago
    I agree????
  7. droughtbreaker

    More than a month ago
    is 11 times in 24 hours really a record Ive done 18 in 12 hours
  8. allinmymind

    More than a month ago
    Some here could masturbate for quite a few hours, going on chat a few months ago.
  9. petal6969

    More than a month ago
    I'm with you Sweetangelic3...how the f..... does a penis ,or in our case Mr. lift a weight of 113kgs..Ok,I can imagine it lifting it,but what shape is the weight..is it a barbell??how does it hold on?? lol...I have all these pics running thru my head,does it sorta curl under and then over,what happens if it drops!!! Does it need one of those guys that stand behind.
    This means that when a woman,not even a small woman,sits on him,he can lift her....lol....I wanna see pics!!!


    More than a month ago
    It's tied with some sort of strap and lift lol.
  10. EroticTouch2016

    More than a month ago
    A few other points:

    1. There is nothing like a nice cock-ring on a smooth , erect penis....makes it looks ready for pleasure
    2. By contracting my pelvic muscles I can make the head expand.....try it guys, gives the woman even more pleasure
    3. Edging leads to a massive load and a great feeling of excitement


    More than a month ago
    cock ring can do damage to the penis


    More than a month ago
    Ha ha yes had a few girls give the look of "wtf" when flexing. Love it! :D
  11. paddy138

    More than a month ago
    Girls will have to satisfied with my 7 inches.
  12. Sweetangelic3

    More than a month ago
    God, I so wish we could see these records being made.. I have great visuals now of how they are posting to see who cum the most/ furthest. ... or what they are attaching to do the weight lifting g.. interesting read though.. Thanks


    More than a month ago
    Lets try and see how far we can get it to go??

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