Kink to Vanilla: It's all on offer in the world of Adult Dating!

by Cam Langdon - 26 October 2012 - 5 Member Comments
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Roll up and welcome to the freak show that is online dating! Hang on for an exciting and exhilarating ride full of spills and thrills.

One of the most interesting aspects of online dating, especially adult dating, is its diversity. Online dating forums such as Adult Match Maker offer you a venue for meeting the widest variety of human beings you could possibly imagine. I call it a freak show here because for many people, other members may seem totally weird, odd, crazy, or abnormally kinky, while for others these folks will appear as completely normal, and even attractive.

That guy covered from head to toe in tattoos who likes to suck on women’s toes may frighten some females to death, but to other women out there a guy like this may get their hearts racing and knickers wet. Similarly, that BBW lady dressed in Goth clothing who has a fetish for skinny and submissive men will be many guys’ wet dream come true.

Sure, there are lots of white-bread, vanilla folks on dating sites who want to meet exactly the same kind of average person. And that’s okay. But, be prepared to be approached by guys and girls who may not be to your taste.

But freaky, “normal” or whatever, there are still some basic principles that will determine whether you get to be the lucky guy or girl who gets to live out their fantasies with that person of their desires.

The number one bugbear that I am hearing from the ladies is the lack of decency that guys show when they make their initial contact with women online. So, as Aretha Franklin said, show a little respect. If you expect a favourable response from someone you contact, you must remember that they are a living, breathing person with feelings, and not just an abstract “thing” that could become the object of your sexual desires. If you want that, buy yourself a blow-up doll.

Sure, maybe you just want to meet someone for casual sex rather than a long-term relationship. But even in this case, you need to set yourself apart as an interesting prospect among all of the other potential competition. Don’t send a message to a woman saying you have a huge cock and you can satisfy her in bed like no-one else, even if that may be true. The reason is there are plenty of other guys on the dating site who might have the same physical attributes and talents as you, but can get the message across without making the woman think she is some kind of a slut.

Once you have charmed a girl or a guy online with your humour and wit, then you can start pushing the envelope a little to gauge whether he or she is as freaky as you. You will be amazed at how a subtle approach can later be followed up by more sexual communication, as long as you have spent that little bit of time in establishing a basis of respect and trust.

Much of the feedback I have had from readers of my online dating tips for men confirms the author’s own experience – that women can transform from shy and cautious creatures into raunchy and lusty babes when the proper groundwork has been done.

Females members of Adult Match Maker have also left little doubt that the number one reason they either fail to respond to men or tell them to piss off is that the guys’ initial ham-fisted attempts to contact women are insulting and rude.

So guys, if you want to be play an active part in the online dating freak show, make sure you don’t ruin any chances you may have by acting like a douche bag.

5 Member Comments

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  1. NLindsayfan

    More than a month ago
    Thank you for that. I will say, however, that many women also display arrogance and rudeness in replies to what is a genuine and respectful approach - especially if one is outside of what is apparently and acceptable age. I have had some very hurtful replies to compliments in messages in which it was made clear that I was aware of their limits set but wanted to let them know I enjoyed the profile or the pics.
  2. ArchangelDD

    More than a month ago
    totally agree with above comment....saw a guy's profile which opened with "I treat a lady with respect" [thought "hmm nice :)"]....get a wink from him, and was about to reply, whennnn I got a message from him, "want to ride my cock?"...no hello, or anything :-/ blocked him
  3. Hotdoll60

    More than a month ago
    Very well said. Just because you are on an adult dating site doesn't mean that manners can go out the door. Have the decency to ask my name before you ask to see my naked body. The soft approach will get you much further than "how about a f***"
  4. Mr.BA89

    More than a month ago
    Many people seem to think that simply because they're online, common (or not so common) courtesy takes hike. It's a similar phenomenon to driving. Many people who would normally be quite nice and courteous, start becoming incredibly rude on the road (cutting in, merging irrationally, speeding, tailgating, etc.), largely because they are 'isolated' and 'safe' in their own little space. Online dating seems to remove the 'human connection' so people seem to act less 'humane' in a similar fashion. Unfortunately for anything to change, people need to become aware that there is a need for change in themselves first, not something that most people are comfortable admitting to themselves, let alone others.
  5. itching4it

    More than a month ago
    it sure is a a freak show, a very fascinating one at that!

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